Thursday, July 8, 2010

Drivezilla on the loose!

So I started my driving lessons today. It was great. My first time behind the wheel and it felt wonderful! ... in fact it felt as if driving was an a inborn talent. Mom and Big B who were supposedly going to “instruct me” were watching flabbergasted! There I was cruising merrily along the road dodging dogs and children alike, speeding past the everyday cars in my shiny new Volvo! Wow! It was pretty cool. And waving to all the neighbors as they stared at the speed, the grace, the poise with which the car was being handled! Quite a heady mixture of all that adrenaline and epinephrine and what not!!!!!!!!!  Amazing right?
…………………………………………………………
But that’s not how it went at all!  *sigh*. In fact it couldn’t have gone worse! Just starting the car took me half an hour! Every time I managed to start it, there would be this deafening noise from the engine which would lead to me hurriedly taking my dainty feet off the accelerator and volia! The car would lurch forward, splutter and the engine die out!!! So by the time I finally got on the road tempers were flying to say the least!  

I learned how to master the steering. With mom shouting “Turn! Turn” in my ear nearly rendering me deaf, I turned the wheel and ended up going round and round in a circle like a dog chasing its tail!
Well the dizziness took a while to subside! And I decided to brave the road once more! This time I took fancy to a nice woman who was taking home eggs for breakfast. I stalked the said lady for quite a while till she literally ran into a side alley screaming for the traffic police while I went on nonchalantly, intent on bulldozing everything and everyone brave enough to venture onto my path! There was a tractor, a couple of rickshaws and countless pedestrians who would either stop or cross over to the opposite side to steer clear of my path!

Huh! If I’d just learnt to drive when I was young, we would never have been late for school due to traffic! :)
Anyway to avoid further damaging Mother Nature and partially to avoid mom from having a heart attack every second, I decided to head back home………. 
And lo behold when we got home and I reluctantly handed the car back to mom ….. 
what did these eyes of mine see????

………I had been drivin’ around the city with the handbrake up!!!

3 comments:

SaJ said...

Welcome to the blogging world J. Jay!!!
And you forgot to the mention the lights were on too....and in broad day-light!!! :p

J Jay. said...

they were not!!!!!!
now you;re just being moronic!!!
you're just jealous cuz i write good!:P

• » ∂я.¢нιℓє ¢нєℓ¢ « • said...

lol great;)
well no one can expect that all at speed ov 40:(
now i guess i've got right to say u sluggish snail:p???